I can’t stop thinking about Mackenzie Anderson.
I didn’t know her. I never will. But I do know that what happened to her, should never have happened.
Mackenzie did all the ‘right’ things, she adhered to the ‘process’.
She had an AVO out against her attacker.
She’d moved.
She had no contact with him.
She’d turned her life around and was doing her best to better herself and care for her three year old son.
Yet she was murdered in her own home, in front of her child, at just 21 years old, by an ex-partner.
Every part of that sentence is shocking.
Detective Superintendent Wayne Humphrey reported: "Officers attached to Newcastle City Police District were called to a home unit, responding to reports a man had broken into the unit. I've just spent the last 20 minutes or so viewing the officers' body-worn footage and it was a horrendous scene, horrendous."
Mackenzie Anderson is the 14th woman to die in Australia this year at the hands of domestic violence.
On average, one woman a week is murdered by her current or former partner – we’re on track to hit that this year. And that's just women who’ve lost their lives, let alone the women who have suffered any kind of abuse.
Family and domestic violence and abuse is not just physical, it’s:
Emotional
Sexual
Social
Financial
Spiritual
Coercive control
Change is happening. NSW is in the process of making coercive control illegal – a big step in the right direction – but it’s not enough.
Sad truths:
Domestic and family violence can happen to anyone.
One in four women in Australia will experience domestic violence in their lifetime.
It’s the most common reason women and children are homeless in Australia.
To make matters worse, family and domestic violence has increased as a result of the pandemic.
EVERYONE should be outraged.
EVERYONE should be angry.
EVERYONE should want change.
It’s beyond devastating and heartbreaking that a young mother has lost her life – and for what? Likely because of some bullshit excuse the 22 year old male, recently released on parole, will give for why he stabbed his ex-girlfriend over a dozen times.
It’s time to stop teaching women how to ‘protect themselves’, what ‘they should do in a DV situation’ and start dealing with the source of the problem: violent men.
Statistics show that perpetrators have often been victims of family and domestic violence themselves. We’re trapped in an endless cycle – and that merry-go-round needs to stop.
So, what can YOU do?
Learn the warning signs – physical, emotional and behavioural – so that you can be prepared to act and support
Believe the victim – more women need to be believed when they start to feel unsafe
Stop victim blaming and perpetuating myths
Consider what you do and say in your own life that contributes to this toxic cultural problem
Financially support or volunteer for support and advocacy services, big and small:
We need more laws, policies and programs that protect victims. But more than that, we need to break the cycle and change this toxic culture that gives men the subconscious belief that they can behave and treat women this way.
Enough is enough.
I can’t stop thinking about Mackenzie Anderson – and nor should we. Something must change.
