ALWAYS WAS,
ALWAYS WILL BE.

I acknowledge the Traditional Owners of the Biripi & Worimi land where I work and live.

I pay my respects to Elders past and present for they hold the memories, the traditions and the culture.

I celebrate the stories, culture and traditions of all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people across this nation.


Tinder Musings (Dad! Don't read this.)

Isabel Sandercock-Brown
LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS

This is what I’ve learnt from my short stint on Tinder. And can I just say: it’s tough out there.

NOTE TO MY DAD: Don’t read this. 

  1. There are A LOT of primary school teachers that I would not want teaching my kids 

  2. Guys post pics of their cars, like ??? 

  3. Do guys post pics of the fish they’ve caught to:

    1. Prove they can catch a winner?

    2. Show you there’s more fish in the sea?

  4. But seriously – has any girl ever looked at a guy holding a big fish and thought “that’s it, that’s the guy for me”?

  5. Sexist bylines aren’t funny. Who swipes (whatever the correct way) is on that?

  6. If there’s a photo of a super attractive guy and his friend, it’s the friend. 

  7. Most guys are bad at spelling. And typing. And chatting. And life, it seems. 

  8. 75% look like serial killers but it’s only a 25% chance they are because most men are just downright terrible at choosing their pictures. 

  9. Married guys genuinely go on there to cheat on their wives – pigs. 

  10. They link instagram accounts with photos of their ex girlfriends as the last photo. Well, I hope it’s their ex-girlfriend… 

  11. They’re smart with the dogs pics, they’ll getcha that way. 

  12. They’ll post topless mirror selfies even if they aren’t ripped, proving that there really is no one more confident than a mediocre white man. 

  13. You set your location limit to 30km and it shows you someone in Woop Woop 2,349 kms away. 

  14. Lotta beards out there. 

  15. Even more bad tattoos (and THAT’s coming from someone with Tinkerbell and a flamingo).

  16. If he tells you he’s got his shit together, you can be almost one hundred percent sure that he does not, in fact, have his shit together. 

  17. Many struggle with the different ‘to, too, and two’s’ – let alone bringing the ‘yours’ into the equation.

  18. Not really appreciating all the life advice – ‘Life’s short. Live it up.’ Yeah ok, Dave. You have a photo of yourself with a goon bag. 

  19. They’ll have: ‘SEARCHING 4 SOULM8’ in their bio. But if you were really that keen on finding your soulmate, surely you’d take the time to type the 3 extra letters?

  20. It’s a numbers game – 0 x 10’s, 1000 x 5’s, 123948 swipes = maybe one good one.

  21. Girls have a rep for being clingy – but guys are SO much worse. (Like I saw your message, the extra ??? aren’t helping.)

  22. The old adage remains true: the more unavailable you are, the more they want you. 

So good luck out there. Or try the old fashioned way of meeting people: put a note in a bottle, cast it out to the ocean and cross your fingers. 


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